All right....a few Airline Jokes

From a Southwest Airlines employee: "Welcome
aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa. To
operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab
into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just
like every other seat belt; and, if you don't
know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't
be out in public unsupervised."

"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure,
masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming,
grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you
have a small child traveling with you, secure your
mask before assisting with theirs. If you are
traveling with more than one small child, pick your
favorite."

Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some
broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before
we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you,
or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."

Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in
the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle
to shore and take them with our compliments."